Romani Folklore Therapy

Snow White

The Snow White character is forever a small girl. She never grows up. She is kind-hearted, naive, generous to a fault, and a natural lover of nature, but because of her inability to mature she is often subject to betrayal and to being outwitted by just about everyone. She can be a prime suspect for narcissistic abuse, particularly from older females. In fact, she will quite often have mother problems. She is often seen indulging in childhood fantasies, even when she is older. Snow Whites do well to become aware of the dangers that can lurk in the outside world; they have a need to develop boundaries, and to focus on learning what growing up and maturing means.

Witch Queen

The witch is a powerful woman, traditionally ugly. She appears in most folktales. In earlier times, ugliness was considered powerful - very different from the cosmetic-surgery age we live in today! However, the witch as an archetype has changed considerably through the centuries, and in our modern new-age era we have nicefied the witch, and tend to forget how we saw witches in earlier eras: disturbing, egotistical, narcissistic old women, always to be revered and feared. That is why she is often cast in positions of power in folktales: queen or stepmother. She can often appear with a beautiful exterior, but beneath there will be a formidable force to be reckoned with. She is not without her fears, and the formidable force that she is has usually been developed from heartache and neglect in earlier life. Usually an older more mature woman, the witch queen is endowed with intuitive powers, is highly intelligent, but also carries a lot of envy for younger women.

Wolf

The wolf is the major narcissistic male of the folktale world, the male version of the witch queen. He responds to a difficult past by becoming something of a predator, using people for his supply of adulation and praise. Highly intuitive and intelligent, dominant and competitive, at all costs, he must win. Although on the positive side, wolf people will take the lead and get any job done, take care not to trust them too much. Give them an inch and they will take a yard. A relationship between a woman and a wolf man is best conducted in a light-hearted fashion, if at all, and good management skills will be necessary. He will be charming, alluring, polite, helpful and indispensable to those he meets, but in reality he will lure the innocent so that he can devour them, and when they are sufficiently his, he will use them to feed his own ego as a means of keeping his own trauma and fear at bay.

Cinderella

Cinderella can feel good about herself, but can also have low self-worth. This features in all kinds of conditions: from general depression and lack of confidence to bipolar and borderline traits. A beautiful princess, but also a shy and retiring kitchen worker, she can be the highest of the high, but just as quickly the lowest of the low, all wrapped up in one person. Sometimes snappy and tense when low, she can be at a loss as to how to manage life having been tormented by those close to her in the past: the ugly sisters and unkind stepmother being a key example. Often the scapegoat and a victim of abuse, she takes all that life flings at her and is often simply a victim of herself.

Jack

Jack has ambitions running alongside everything he does, so he seeks to prove himself. He is everyone's humorous mate, a high climber (as in the beanstalk), a high flyer, and will often walk into situations he can't always handle, where he will likely make a mess of things - and a fool of himself. Nothing stops him, however, from exerting himself and coming back for more when trying to achieve something. He is adventurous and often impulsive, but unlike wolf people, Jack people will never be out to manipulate anyone intentionally when he finds himself having to make plans to escape difficult situations when they occur. Jack has a naturally good heart and likes to help everyone. He is never short on courage, although it can be masqueraded as stupidity sometimes. Hence, Jack is quite the fool of the bunch of popular folktale characters.

Red Riding Hood

Red Riding Hood can become hopelessly involved with toxic characters who are out to manipulate her, but none more so than the wolf. She is inclined to fall for a manipulative man (or woman's) charms more than any other character, but with a view to absorbing that character as part of herself. While Snow White is too afraid to engage with the wolf, and Cinderella is too involved with herself and her own ups and downs to engage, Red Riding Hood is lured by the charming romantic and sexual harmony the wolf bestows when first meeting him. Intelligence and charm are what mesmerises her; she also has a great need to feel loved. It is a magical moment when the wolf reels her in, and how she loves his care and attention! If someone goes out of their way to make her happy, secure and special, she will be satisfied and will lose herself within that person. Only with time does Red Riding Hood discover the toxicity within a person she has become fond of.

Frog Prince

Beng, the name Romani people give to the devil, often appears in the form of a frog or toad. He is a quick-change artist, clever at transforming himself into different characters when he needs to, mostly out of insecurity and an inability to be himself. Dominant, manipulative, he is also desperate, and never likes to be caught out and/or challenged. He lures women, not purely with his masculine charms as the Wolf might, but with his ability to transform from one persona to another, to be what someone wishes him to be, which helps him feel needed. Many can find the Frog exasperating, merely wanting him to be himself and not feel he has to exhibit other parts of himself to win people over. Impulsivity is high on his list and causes him tobe prone to lies. The prince in the original story is rather egotistical, which is what caused a witch to change him into a frog in the first place. He is perhaps the male version of Cinderella.

Sleeping Beauty

Sleeping Beauty is under a spell, asleep inside, or not alert or awake enough to register what takes place around her. Dissociation is a key feature of this character; she generally switches off when things get too much to bear. She has withstood some generally unpleasant circumstances in her past, and dissociating from them is her only way of coping. She may have blocked trauma out, big time, or is choosing to disregard it, and we might describe her as someone who has her head in the clouds, or who is just not paying enough attention; she may be described as an eternal dreamer. She is unlikely to complete tasks because she is unable to concentrate and will prefer to let others do everything for her should they offer. Agreeable, she can end up treating someone who may be her enemy the same as someone who may be her friend. This will be because she finds it difficult to process who people are, and she prefers to say nice things about everyone rather than tackle something head on.

Beast

The Beast of Beauty and the Beast presents a very different male from those mentioned above. Traditionally, the Beast has been cursed by an evil fairy because he refused to be seduced by her. His character is under the influence of someone who manipulates him; he finds it difficult to manage this. Beasts grow up without good parental guidance, and might often be betrayed or abandoned by a mother who may have left him to his own devices. He is thereafter in danger of becoming a victim of other manipulating women's whims, and he may feel stupid and ugly or a freak, or simply not very attractive as a person in his adult years. His kindness means he is taken advantage of. Beasts are animal-like, and just like animals are accepting and get along as best they can. They may prefer to hide away rather than draw attention to themselves, and people may believe they are not so clever, not so eligible to be counted as someone who deserves praise or recognition.

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